We recently attended the service of one of our beloved family members and I can’t put into words the devastation I felt. Grief is such a difficult emotion that everyone processes differently and while I really struggled with it, I had an especially hard time talking to my children about it
Naturally, I turned to books, which proved to be an easier way for me to open up a conversation about loss and remembering loved ones.
I’ve compiled a list of books that focus on this complex subject and while I hope this is a list that you never need to turn to, I hope you feel comforted knowing that there are resources available.
The list includes books focusing on losing a loved one, parent, grandparent, pet, and grief in general.
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LOSS OF A LOVED ONE
See You On the Other Side by Rachel Montez Minor, illustrated by Mariyah Rahmanm 2023
(Ages 4 and up)
“Our paths will cross again and again. Our hearts remain tied. This isn’t the end.”
Lyrical text reassures children that their loved ones are never truly gone. They can still be felt around us in our dreams, in our memories, and in quiet moments. The inclusive illustrations feature transparent outlines of grandparents, parents, pets, and friends that remain close to us whenever we may need them. This book is so incredibly beautiful and comforting. I highly recommend it.
Always Remember by Cece Meng; illustrated by Jago, 2016
(Ages 4 and up)
Old Sea Turtle may be gone, but his legacy lives on in the memory of his friends. Striking underwater scenes capture how Old Sea Turtle’s kind actions greatly impacted his friends and how they will always remember him as a wonderful teacher, brave explorer, and most of all, as a caring friend. This gentle and hopeful book helps children realize that while our loved ones may not be physically here any longer, part of them will always remain with us.
GRIEF IN GENERAL
Grief is an Elephant by Tamara Ellis Smith, illustrated by Nancy Whitesides
This beautiful book personifies grief as a variety of animals that get smaller with time. They follow a young girl who eventually learns to face her grief head on by talking about it. Over time, her grief shrinks to the size of a firefly. As she watches it light up the dark sky, she is able to remember her loved one with peace.
Maybe Tomorrow? by Charlotte Agell; illustrated by Ana Ramírez González, 2019
(Ages 4 and up)
A metaphorical block that represents depression or grief is tethered to poor Elba. When an exuberant alligator named Norris befriends her, he sits quietly with her and listens when she reveals that she misses her friend Little Bird. While Elba feels that she may always have her block, she is comforted by Norris’ friendship. He helps her carry her block until it eventually shrinks and becomes lighter. This touching story helps children recognize grief and feel reassured and hopeful that sharing their sadness with a friend can help them heal.
When Sadness Is At Your Door by Eva Eland, 2019
(Ages 4 and up)
In this standout picture book, sadness is personified as a blue bloblike creature. The way it makes children feel is brilliantly demonstrated using simple illustrations paired with sparse text. The book encourages children to partake in quiet activities like drawing or listening to music when sad. One of the main take-aways from the book is that it is okay to welcome sadness and that it may disappear as unexpectedly as it arrived. This is a book that will be appreciated by adults as well as children.
LOSS OF A PARENT
That’s Me Loving You by Amy Krouse Rosenthal; illustrated by Teagan White, 2016
(Ages 3 and up)
This simple, but powerful book reassures readers that the unbreakable bond between a parent and child is eternal and ever present regardless of physical proximity. The charming illustrations displaying a variety of diverse children perfectly compliment the comforting text.
Cape by Kevin Johnson, illustration by Kitt Thomas, 2023
(Ages 4 and up)
On the day of his father’s funeral, a young boy puts on a cape to block out the memories of his dad. They are just too hard to bear. When they continue to bubble up, however, he finally embraces them and finds comfort in the good times they shared. The concise, but tender words paired with beautifully expressive illustrations come together to create a truly moving story based on the author’s own experience.
Boats for Papa by Jessixa Bagley, 2015
(Ages 5 and up)
This tender tale uses soft watercolors to capture the sweet and somber tone of this heart-felt story. Buckley and his mother live together on the beach together leading a simple, but loving life. When Buckley finds driftwood on his birthday, he builds a boat and sends it out to sea with a note for his Papa who he misses dearly. Over time, Buckley sends numerous boats only to discover that his mother has been finding the boats and putting them away. In its own way, this helps Buckley heal and find an even deeper connection with his mother.
LOSS OF A GRANDPARENT
Grandpa’s Stories: A Book of Remembering by Joseph Coelho and Allison Colpays, 2019
(Ages 4 and up)
Heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time, this is a beautiful story of the love between a grandparent and grandchild. Gorgeous illustrations and touching text follow a girl and her grandfather through the seasons as they explore, play, and create together. In winter, the grandfather shares stories of his youth until the day he passes away. After finding a notebook her grandfather left for her, the girl honors him by recording their memories together.
The colorful illustrations and hopeful ending add an uplifting element to the book providing a feeling of reassurance during a time of loss.
Sora’s Seashells by Helena Ku Rhee, illustrated by Stella Lim with Ji-Hyuk Kim, 2023
It is hard to find the words to accurately describe how moving this tender story is. Sora and her grandmother Halmoni love scouring the beach for seashells during Halmoni’s yearly summer visits. Sora is dismayed to be teased for her name upon starting kindergarten and even more devastated when she receives news that Halmoni has passed away. In a beautiful scene, Sora’s parents bring her to the beach to explain that her name means seashell in Korean and Halmoni suggested she be named Sora because, like a beautiful shell, she is their greatest gift.
When she returns to school, Sora explains to the class the origin of her name and shares her most beloved seashells with all of them including the kids who teased her with surprising results. With its incredible lesson in kindness and generosity, this book is a true standout.
Dadaji’s Paintbrush by Rashmi Sirdeshpande, Ruchi Mhasane, 2022
A young boy loves to do everything with his grandfather, Dadaji, especially paint. When his grandfather passes away, he puts aside his grandfather’s old paintbrush until a young girl knocks on the door and asks him to teach her to paint like Dadaji did. Taking out his Dadaji’s special paintbrush reignites his passion for painting and helps him feel connected once more to his grandfather.
Ocean Meets Sky by The Fan Brothers, 2018
(Ages 4 and up)
With its stunning fantastical illustrations and poignant story about love, loss, and moving on. This elegantly told tale follows Finn, who honors the memory of his grandfather by building a boat on what would have been his grandfather’s 90th birthday. Finn dreams that the boat will sail him to the mysterious place his grandfather told stories about where ocean meets sky. Readers will not be able to look away from the gorgeous dreamlike illustrations of The Fan Brothers.
LOSS OF A PET
The Longest Let’sGoBoy by Derick Wilder, illustrated by Catia Chien, 2021
An older dog narrates his last day as he relishes in one last walk with his owner. This beautifully told story expertly captures the beloved bond between owner and pet. In a peaceful and poignant scene, the dog is ready to move on, but his love for his owner will love on forever.
Remembering by Xelena González, illustrated by Adriana M. Garcia, 2023
A little girl honors her beloved dog by sharing memories of him, bringing out his favorite toys, and creating an ofrenda for Dia de los Muertos. The thoughtful text recounts the significance of each item she brings to the altar while the spectacular illustrations highlight how the girl’s memories keep the spirit of the dog alive.
The Rough Patch by Brian Lies, 2018
(Ages 6 and up)
This Caldecott Honor book beautifully captures the heart-wrenching loss felt after the death of a beloved pet.
Evan and his dog did everything together, but their favorite activity was working in the garden. When his pet passes away, Evan’s feelings of bitterness and anger are brilliantly captured in the vivid illustrations of prickly weeds that invade his garden. When he unexpectantly discovers a pumpkin in the overgrowth, he enters it in a state fair with surprising results.
The death of a pet is difficult for anyone to experience, especially a child, but books as poignant as this gorgeous offering can help readers better understand the mourning process.
LOSS OF A FRIEND
Missing Violet by Kelly Swemba, illustrated by Fabiana Faiallo, 2023
(Ages 5 and up)
When a young girl’s best friend named Violet dies, she experiences several stages of grief. Ultimately, she finds comfort in writing letters to Violet and keeping a special box with pictures and trinkets that remind her of their friendship. She also keeps Violet’s kind spirit alive through being a good friend to others.
Losing a friend at a young age is very difficult to process, but this book does an excellent job demonstrating the process of grief and providing several coping mechanisms.
LONG-TERM ILLNESS
Making Happy by Sheetal Sheth, illustrated by Khoe Le, 2022
(Ages 6 and up)
When Leila’s mom gets sick, she becomes confused and saddened by the changes she sees in her mom. Just when she thinks she can’t bear it anymore, her parents help her find joy in small moments of dancing and being silly together. This visually stunning story beautifully captures one girl’s journey as she processes several difficult emotions and her ability to cope with her mother’s illness.
FUNERALS
The Funeral by Matt James, 2018
This unique story presents a funeral from a child’s perspective. When Norma attends the service celebrating her great-uncle Frank’s life, she has a mix of emotions. She knows she is supposed to be sad, but she is happy to see her favorite cousin. While she spends most of the day playing, she reflects on the memorial and believes her great-uncle Frank would be happy.
While this story doesn’t exactly focus on grief, it does open discussions on what children can expect when attending a funeral.
GRIEF DURING THE HOLIDAYS
Eden and Ellie’s Christmas is Not the Same by Autumn and Brandon Cohen, illustrated by Bridget Wallace, 2023
(Ages 3 and up)
Coping with the loss of a loved one is difficult any time of year but can especially be painful over the holidays. This book delicately addresses grief and provides an opportunity to honor a lost loved one by creating a stocking for them. In the story, Eden and her cat brainstorm special items they can leave in the stocking and settle upon a thoughtful poem. I especially appreciate the note to caregivers and space in the back for children to create their own poems or letters to loved ones.
Where is Poppy? by Caroline Kusin Pritchard, illustrated by Dana WulfekottePassover is here, but one young girl is missing her Poppy too much to enjoy it. However, as the family participates in cherished traditions, she begins to sense Poppy’s enduring presence. The soft illustrations mirror the somber tone of the story until the girl discovers while her grandfather may have passed away, his spirit continues to thrive through their shared traditions and heritage,. At this point, the tone of the story changes to one of happy memories with color-filled pages.
The Heart Never Forgets by Ana Ot, illustrated by Hayden GoodmanFor more books on this difficult subject, visit my Amazon Storefront HERE.
